My friend and I were talking about hooking up one day. I was telling her
that hooking up is just two people agreeing to use each other. She answered
that it was ok, As long as the partners are in agreement of using each other,
there was no issue. I was surprised with her answer considering she was a girl.
So what is
hooking up anyway?
Hooking up
typically means some kind of casual sexual contact, up to and including
intercourse itself. It is very “in” and rampant in yuppiedom.
We live in a
time where hooking up is not scandalous anymore. As long as you are both
“consenting adults” you can hook up. Even if society has justified “using each
other”, the fact still remains that a person has been used. And people were
never created to be used, only to be loved.
To be used
means that your dignity has been lowered to an object. Only objects are used.
It means that your partner or yourself has disrespected the dignity of the
other. The other is no longer a human being but an object of my desire.
.jpg)
Speaking of
such relationships, I think, “Deep within yourself, listen to your conscience
which calls you to be pure. . . . A home is not warmed by the fire of pleasure
which burns quickly like a pile of withered grass. Passing encounters are only
a caricature of love, they injure hearts
and mock our own innerself’s plan.” In
the long run, no one benefits from these kinds of relationships.
I heard of
one young husband who said, “I would do anything, anything, to forget the
sexual experiences I had before I met my wife. . . . The pictures of the past
and the other women go through my head, and it’s killing any intimacy. The
truth is, I have been married to this wonderful woman for eight years and I
have never been ‘alone’ in the bedroom with her.”
When you
“hook up” for fun, physical intimacy begins to lose its depth, greatness,
sacredness, and power to bond two people. Sex creates a bond between partners.
That is how it was created so husband and wife will stay with each other. If
you are making having sex as casual as a hand shake, you are like a masking
tape that has been stuck from one skin to the next. Sooner or later, the tape
will lose its bonding ability. So will you if you go hooking up here and there.
“Often this
is nothing more than two people agreeing to use each other for mutual
gratification. They receive the physical pleasure of being held and the
emotional pleasure of being desired, and they remain together so long as they
are a source of pleasure for each other. This is not far from prostitution.” –
Jason Evert
All of us
desire to be loved. But as long as we are treating each other as objects, we
will never be satisfied.
Only real love can satisfy us. It is a love that is
patient and pure.
We were
never created to be used, only to be loved.
To “hook up”
is to get hooked down. And you deserve better.
