Live for yourself.. not others

 Do you constantly trying to prove to others that you are “good enough?”


We must admit that most of our actions are motivated to win the acceptance and admiration of our peers. There is something about pleasing people that pleases us.


Most of the time, it is our personal insecurities that cause this “I need to be good enough for you” mentality. One psychologist said that to even entertain this “I need to be good enough” debate in your head is already a choice to go to the path of unhappiness. For you will never be good enough in your mind. You will always find something that you need to be “good enough” to please others.


To live in the mercy of other’s approval and acceptance is like building your life on shifting sands. People’s opinions are fickle. They love you today and then hate you tomorrow. We can see this with movie stars and music artist. Here today and gone tomorrow. Putting the direction of your life at other’s hands is to miss out your own life.
We need to learn to accept ourselves. Even those things we do not like in ourselves. Accepting does not mean liking what you see, but accepting that they are real. If you have a bad temper, you do not need to like your bad temper. But you must accept that you have one!


Only when we accept ourselves for who we really are can we start to grow. We must accept our strengths and also our weakness, the good and the bad in us. Only when we can look at ourselves objectively can we start changing those aspects of our lives that need improvements.


We must first win the approval of ourselves. I approve of me! Yes I approve of me because God approves of me. If God did not approve of me, I would not even be here.
If you want to win the approval of others, win the approval of the God first. God approves of your creation, but do you think He approves on how you are living your life right now?


But why do we want God’s approval on our lives?


Because we want joy!


Happiness can only be found when we are in line with God’s plan for our lives.

Dream big if u dare to achieve it..

"Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve."
Would you agree with the statement that a dream is born from an idea-a simple idea conceived in the mind?
Back in the 19th century two brothers had an idea which eventually became their passionate and consuming dream. Their relentless pursuit of that dream was rewarded with an accomplishment that changed world travel.
On Friday December 17, 1903 at 10:35 AM, the Wright brothers (Wilbur and Orville) achieved their dream. They flew "the world's first power-driven, heavier-than-air machine in which man made free, controlled, and sustained flight." This memorable feat took place at Kitty Hawk, North Carolina on a cold windy morning.
The dream started with an idea that was planted in their minds by a toy given to them by their father. In the words of the boys, "Late in the autumn of 1878, our father came into the house one evening with some object partly concealed in his hands, and before we could see what it was, he tossed it into the air. Instead of falling to the floor, as we expected, it flew across the room till it struck the ceiling, where it fluttered awhile, and finally sank to the floor." This simple toy made of bamboo, cork and stretched rubber bands, fascinated the Wright brothers and sparked their lifelong interest in human flight.
The Wright brothers were great thinkers. They enjoyed learning new things. Initially, they recycled broken parts, built a printing press and opened their own printing office. Their interest moved to bicycles and in 1893, they opened the Wright Cycle Company where they sold and repaired bicycles. But Wilbur (the older brother) had his mind set on something more exciting. He decided to seriously pursue flying.
The brothers spent many hours researching, testing their machines and making improvements after unsuccessful attempts at human flight. What started out as a hobby soon became a passion. With determination and patience they realized their dream in 1903.
The next time you hear or see an airplane or travel on one, remember where it all started. A simply idea conceived in the minds of two young men who did not finish high school. Believe it or not, they did not have a University degree in Aeronautical Engineering, Mathematics, Physics or any other subject. They were not scientists in the true sense of the word. In fact, many of their peers who did not witness their accomplishment, had trouble believing that two bicycle mechanics from Dayton, Ohio did what they claimed.
What idea or ideas are YOU working on? Have you said you can't do this or that because you are not a scientist? Have you limited yourself by saying you are not smart enough? Or have you joined the majority in saying that everything has already been invented or discovered?
Since the introduction of the first generation of personal computers in 1981, we are able to do many things more efficiently. With a super computer between your ears and the personal computer at your finger tips, your dream can be achieved. First, give birth to that dream with an idea. A simply idea that ANYONE of us can conceive!

Learn from trials....

Have you ever wondered what life really is all about? Have you ever questioned if there is a deeper kind of life than the one you are living?

Most of us seldom ask these questions when life is easy and going our way. We are preoccupied in enjoying ourselves with what we have and we never bother to really meditate about life’s meaning. When everything is all well, we have a tendency to focus on pleasuring ourselves. We have a lot to distract us from asking the big questions in life, like “What is it all about?”

These are where trials can help us.

Trials can be shock therapy to wake us from our self-absorption. When we are stripped of our pleasures and distractions, we are forced to look at life in a different way.

A rich person can fall to the trap of Materialism. His life meaning becomes accumulating objects instead of loving people. Since he has the money to fund his materialism, he can continue to distract himself and live a shallow life till the end of his days. Sometimes loosing his riches is the best remedy for him.

For an addict to be sober he must be cut off from his drugs. It is also true with us. We also need to be separated with the things that feed our disordered desires to achieve sobriety.

If a person thinks that life is all about wealth, and he loses his wealth, he is now forced to look life differently. He is now forced to learn to live life without his precious wealth. Now he is strained to move out from his narrow world and live in the real world. He now starts to search life’s meaning beyond what he always knew.

And those who seek shall find.

 If you are experiencing trials maybe God permitted it to wake you up from your false view of life. Maybe it is God’s way to bring back sobriety in your life by cutting of all your distractions.

Many great people have found life’s meaning at their lowest point in life, maybe you are one of them.

Don’t waste your trials. Use them as opportunity to go deeper in life.

The sacrifice.... a story

There was once a bridge which spanned a large river. During most of the day the bridge sat with its length running up and down the river paralleled with the banks, allowing ships to pass thru freely on both sides of the bridge. But at certain times each day, a train would come along and the bridge would be turned sideways across the river, allowing a train to cross it.
A switchman sat in a small shack on one side of the river where he operated the controls to turn the bridge and lock it into place as the train crossed. One evening as the switchman was waiting for the last train of the day to come, he looked off into the distance thru the dimming twilight and caught sight of the trainlights. He stepped to the control and waited until the train was within a prescribed distance when he was to turn the bridge. He turned the bridge into position, but, to his horror, he found the locking control did not work. If the bridge was not securely in position it would wobble back and forth at the ends when the train came onto it, causing the train to jump the track and go crashing into the river. This would be a passenger train with many people aboard. He left the bridge turned across the river, and hurried across the bridge to the other side of the river where there was a lever switch he could hold to operate the lock manually. He would have to hold the lever back firmly as the train crossed. He could hear the rumble of the train now, and he took hold of the lever and leaned backward to apply his weight to it, locking the bridge. He kept applying the pressure to keep the mechanism locked. Many lives depended on this man's strength.
Then, coming across the bridge from the direction of his control shack, he heard a sound that made his blood run cold. "Daddy, where are you?" His four-year-old son was crossing the bridge to look for him. His first impulse was to cry out to the child, "Run! Run!" But the train was too close; the tiny legs would never make it across the bridge in time. The man almost left his lever to run and snatch up his son and carry him to safety. But he realized that he could not get back to the lever. Either the people on the train or his little son must die. He took a moment to make his decision.
The train sped safely and swiftly on its way, and no one aboard was even aware of the tiny broken body thrown mercilessly into the river by the onrushing train. Nor were they aware of the pitiful figure of the sobbing man, still clinging tightly to the locking lever long after the train had passed. They did not see him walking home more slowly than he had ever walked: to tell his wife how their son had brutally died.

Now if you comprehend the emotions which went this man's heart, you can begin to understand the feelings of our Father in Heaven when He sacrificed His Son to bridge the gap between us and eternal life. Can there be any wonder that He caused the earth to tremble and the skies to darken when His Son died? How does He feel when we speed along thru life without giving a thought to what was done for us thru God????

Live summing up your weakness and failures as well

Most of us have a problem with our self image. I think the root of the problem is that we do not really know who we are. Typically our self image is based on the opinion of others. Growing up we have been labeled and branded by a lot of names, mostly based from our weakness and failures.
“Why you no good…”
“You are such a loser.”
“You will never amount to anything.”
“You’re hopeless”
There are a lot more nasty words that have been spoken to us that have shaped how we see ourselves.
Our past mistakes also have broken our self image. Our mistakes have caused us so much pain that it lead to self-hatred. We have become our own worst critic. Sometimes it is you who put yourself down more than anyone else.
“We are not the sum of our weaknesses and failures; we are the sum of the Father’s love for us and our real capacity to become the image of his Son.”
Our weakness and failure does not define us. Our definition comes from the center of our very being. We are beings created out of the sheer love of God. And that the God has left in each and one of us a seed of greatness. And no matter how broken we are this capacity for greatness remains within. For this capacity comes from the fact that we were created in the image and likeness of God. And that is irrevocable.
We have to start defining ourselves differently. We have to stop summing ourselves by the opinion of the world and start seeing ourselves as God sees us. We are precious. We are beautiful.
We are God’s beloved.
God wants us to be great men and women, like his saints were. But we have to stop putting ourselves down. We have to stop looking down on ourselves and start looking up. And when we start to look up, we will see God’ hand reaching out to us. And He will lift us up.
You are awesome. And no one can take that away from you.
Not even yourself…

Are you really happy????

What delights you? How do you make yourself happy? What is the source of your joy? 
Does shopping delights you? Do you find happiness in being popular among your peers? Is accomplishing your goals bring you joy?
Most of us when we think of happiness we think of getting what we want. The media has done a good job ingraining our minds that if you want to be happy, “then go get some”. We have become a society of “Go Getters!” 
But are we really happy with what we've got? Or do we feel that our joy is lacking or incomplete?
When a rich young man approached god and asked what he still lacked. God answered to sell all his possessions and come follow Him. When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.
I once heard a priest  said, “If you feel depressed, go help somebody.”
I have read somwehere, “For it is in giving that we receive.”  Real, deep and abiding joy comes from giving ourselves to others. It is in selflessness and not in selfishness can we find authentic joy. The “Go Givers” are happier than the “Go Getters”. 
If you still have not found the joy that you are looking for, maybe it is time for you to go find it outside of yourself.........

Intelligence in not just trying.....

Have you experience trials in your life? If not, then you must be dead! 

No one escape trials in this life. Only those on the cemetery are free from it. Only those buried six feet underground are resting in peace.
Many of us try to escape our trials in life, only to catch up with us in the end. Unfortunately when it catches up and gets us, it is bigger and meaner. Running away from our trials does not solve anything.
Imagine you are a lazy person. The only thing you do all day long is eat in front of the TV. Your dad noticing that you are becoming unhealthy with the kind of lifestyle you are living. So he decides to get you on a diet and exercise.
If you are a lazy person, your first initial reaction to the diet and exercise is dread and rejection. The diet and exercise to you is a sign of labor and pain. It would also mean lessening your time being a couch potato. So you try to escape it.
But the diet and the exercise are something you need. They are something that can help your body to be healthy again. And the more you are healthy the more you can enjoy life.
I believe God sends us trials for our own sake. We have become obsessed to the least important things in life and have abandoned those things that truly meaningful. We have run after a life of success than of fulfillment and happiness. We have greatly invested on our physical beauty and forgotten to develop our character and inner beauty.
Sometimes God uses trials to get us back in track. Most of us have chosen an unhealthy and worldly lifestyle that is self-destructive. Most of the times trials can knock us back to our senses. It can give us a reality check. All is not well. And most importantly you are not well.

We can view our trials as a health program for the soul. Taken well, it can eliminate those fats in our soul, like laziness, irresponsibility, indifference to the plight of others etc. It can also help us build our character. Trials can strengthen the soul. It can also be a source of wisdom. You are able to see the “real world” and not what is on TV. It can give you a deeper understanding of life, of others and yourself.
Michael Jordan did not become great because he was playing with monkeys. He became great because he was tried and challenged by the best of the best. And he overcame them. MJ won’t be a legend if he defeated monkeys in basketball!
Trials are opportunity for your personal growth and greatness. Do not run away from it.

Where are we heading?????

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Are you the kind of person who moves fast? Do you pursue things with much zeal and impatience?
Moving fast is great, if you are heading the right way. But if you are going the wrong way, you are getting lost fast!
Have you ever asked yourself where exactly are you headed? What is your final destination?
Most of us are caught in the frenzy of pursuing things of this world. We never run out of things to pursue, whether in our careers, businesses or personal lives. We are always on the move trying to get things. We are a society of Go-getters!
But do we actually need the things we are trying to grab? Are the things we are pursuing would make us happy in the end?
Or are we just pursuing them because the media and advertising told us so?
Most of us seldom think about the things we are pursuing. Most of us seldom think who we are as humans. And most of us seldom think what life is all about. Pilling up the things of this world does not guarantee fulfillment. It is like having a great mansion and being all alone in it. Its enormity only makes you realize how alone and lonely you are!
We must first know who we are as humans before we start running after things. To know who you are is to know what will make you really happy. To fail to realize this is to waste your time and energy pursuing empty things. What a waste of life!
So who are we?
We are made in the image and likeness of God. And St John said, “God is love.” So we are beings that are made for love. Love created us, Love sustains us and Love is our end.
Man cannot live without love. He remains a being that is incomprehensible for himself, his life is senseless, if love is not revealed to him, if he does not encounter love, if he does not experience it and make it his own, if he does not participate intimately in it. – John Paul II
Only love can truly make us happy.
If love is not the end of our pursuit, then we are like travelers who traveled the whole world but failed to find a home.
So look at yourself now. After all the pursuit, are you happy?
Or just plain tired?